I'm a huge fan of Harry Potter... NOT Daniel Radcliff but just the movies.

but right before I was gonna see "Harry Potter and the order of Fenix" I thought that I wanted to know how old the actors were, so I started google them and found a site who had that information, but it was about EVERYONE in HP...

I checked all the peoples ages and then I got to them.... the Phelps twins (AKA the Wesley twins), Oliver and James. I started to remember that there was a way to tell them apart, so I started googling that instead... And after a while I found it, so when I had reached that goal, I got bored. So I started looking at pics of them, trying to guess who-was-who.

then after 100 pics I wanted to know more, but only about the oldest of them, Oliver Phelps. it felt weird that I didn't care about his twin, James, but at the same time it felt even more weird that I wanted to know Oliver Phelps, an actor from England who's 4 years older than me, and way taller that me to. but something just me wanting to know even more...

So know, when I've seen the movie and had plenty of time to do stuff, I'm thinking of a boy... no, rather a man... a man who's working as an actor, in the famous HP movies, a man who's playing a twin WITH his twin, I'm talking about Oliver Phelps aka George Wesley, the oldest of the phelps twins who doesn't like rats (I love them though) and who seems like he's more of a smiling guy than a guy with a girlfriend.

I've just realised that i'm probably in love with him, cuz when I think of him I feel like I felt when I was together with my ex, nothing mattered if I just thought of him, a warm feeling inside of me that made me crazy...

I started thinking of going to England (I still live in Sweden) and trying to see him IRL (sounds like I want to stalk him, and that's probably true, but I can't stop thinking about him) I was aldo thinking of going to one of those places were U can get his autograph, but that won't work cuz I'm gonna faint of seeing him...

I've also dreamed of him (I can sometimes dream a future dream, unknownly though, but sometimes I remember it for a while, they are like nothing else, U can walk at the beach and feel everything like it's in real life...) and I've dreamed that someone knock's on the door, I open and there are Oliver (with James behind) asking me if I'm ready, I don't know why, but I'm ready and gets into a car (no specifik color)... the enviroment around tells me that were in England (not in Sweden anyway) we're driving to a place were there a tons of cameras and such things, and we walk to a building and inside we meet Emma and Ruperth, talking to them felt normal, then some of the others comes and we countinue to talking (I'm having problem with big groups of peolpe), I take Olivers hand, he takes mine, and (belive it or not) I close my eyes and when I open them I'm in my room, sleeping in my bed, I look at my hand and finds it holding something, maybe just a feeling of happiness or a wish. but I could feel a warm in that hand, and it wasn't mine, my whole hand feels like it's been grabbing someones hand.

so in short... I'm in love with an actor, it feels the same as when I was together with my ex, but I wonder f my dreams can reach his, since I hope to see him sometime in the real world, face-to-face and tell him anything, ask him anything, just look at him for a while... cuz he's the one that makes me happy, even if it's just me having this feeling, I want to tell him, somehow...